{"id":6201,"date":"2025-10-05T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-10-05T10:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/?p=6201"},"modified":"2025-10-08T21:34:04","modified_gmt":"2025-10-08T21:34:04","slug":"breast-cancer-gave-me-the-body-i-always-wanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/2025\/10\/05\/breast-cancer-gave-me-the-body-i-always-wanted\/","title":{"rendered":"Breast cancer gave me the body I always wanted"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"485\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314716-dfbc.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238147\" alt=\"Kit takes a selfie on a pebble beach\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>My cancer diagnosis was traumatic, but also an opportunity to get the chest I\u2019d always wanted (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>For most women, losing their breasts through <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/cancer\/\" data-track=\"inline-tag-auto-link_article\">cancer<\/a> can be a hugely traumatic experience, both physically and emotionally.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But I\u2019m not\u202fmost\u202fwomen. I identify as trans non-binary, sitting comfortably between genders.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>This was brought into sharp focus in 2021, when I was diagnosed with early-stage <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/breast-cancer\/\" data-track=\"inline-tag-auto-link_article\">breast cancer<\/a>, aged 50.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Of course, my diagnosis was scary. But I have hated my breasts for my entire life. So alongside the trauma of a cancer diagnosis, for me, it was also <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2024\/12\/16\/wanted-breast-cancer-feel-comfortable-body-22198422\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">an opportunity to get the chest I\u2019d always wanted<\/a>.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m aware that\u2019s a shocking thing to say, and for many, a shocking thing to hear.<\/p>\n<p>For all my adult life, there was nothing more terrifying and upsetting than women\u2019s cancer screenings because I never felt like a woman.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>While I have enormous respect for our wonderful <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/nhs\/\">NHS<\/a>, providing life-saving cancer screening, I have always hated looking at or touching my breasts and was terrified of going for smears.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div class=\"factbox\" data-ico=\"factbox_article\" data-track-module=\"factbox_article\">\n<h2 class=\"factbox-title\">\n\t\t\t\tBreast Cancer Awareness Month \t\t\t<\/h2>\n<div class=\"factbox-content\">\n<p>Breast Cancer Awareness Month falls every October designed to raise awareness of the disease and fundraise for research into its cure. <\/p>\n<p>You can read more stories about breast cancer below: <\/p>\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2024\/12\/16\/wanted-breast-cancer-feel-comfortable-body-22198422\/\">I went to bed every night wishing I woke up with cancer<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2024\/10\/18\/lift-shirt-prove-breast-cancer-21815319\/\">I\u2019ve had to lift up my shirt to prove I\u2019ve had breast cancer<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2023\/11\/07\/i-was-the-first-person-in-the-world-to-get-the-breast-cancer-vaccine-19767829\/\">Did you know about the breast cancer vaccine? Until I got it, neither did I<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"550\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314567-f5b3-e1758616613639.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238145\" alt=\"Kit laying in a hospital bed holding a sandwich\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>There was nothing more terrifying and upsetting than women\u2019s cancer screenings (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<div class=\"factbox\" data-ico=\"factbox_article\" data-track-module=\"factbox_article\">\n<h2 class=\"factbox-title\">\n\t\t\t\tJoin Metro&#039;s LGBTQ+ community on WhatsApp\t\t\t<\/h2>\n<div class=\"factbox-content\">\n<p>With thousands of members from all over the world, our vibrant <a href=\"https:\/\/whatsapp.com\/channel\/0029VaZmbEG8kyyPpsk8pS37\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/whatsapp.com\/channel\/0029VaZmbEG8kyyPpsk8pS37\">LGBTQ+ WhatsApp channel<\/a> is a hub for all the latest news and important issues that face the LGBTQ+ community.<\/p>\n<p>Simply\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/whatsapp.com\/channel\/0029VaZmbEG8kyyPpsk8pS37\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/whatsapp.com\/channel\/0029VaZmbEG8kyyPpsk8pS37\">click on this link<\/a><\/strong>, select \u2018Join Chat\u2019 and you\u2019re in! Don&#8217;t forget to turn on notifications!<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>It wasn\u2019t until I was in my mid-forties that I had the language to describe how I identify and suddenly, life made sense.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Still, medical professionals don\u2019t always know how to deal with people who don\u2019t fit the <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/gender\/\" data-track=\"inline-tag-auto-link_article\">gender<\/a> binary.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Days before I hit my half century, my first \u2018you\u2019ve turned 50, <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2025\/01\/24\/one-tiny-symptom-never-thought-cancer-2-22410760\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2025\/01\/24\/one-tiny-symptom-never-thought-cancer-2-22410760\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">here\u2019s your breast cancer screening invite<\/a>\u2019 arrived.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>In attending the appointment, I knew I\u2019d be surrounded by \u2013 what I viewed as \u2013 \u2018proper women\u2019,\u202fdrawing my difference into even starker contrast. However, as my <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2023\/04\/20\/my-mum-died-of-breast-cancer-i-felt-so-connected-to-her-after-i-was-diagnosed-18639190\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2023\/04\/20\/my-mum-died-of-breast-cancer-i-felt-so-connected-to-her-after-i-was-diagnosed-18639190\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">mum had gone through breast cancer<\/a> 15 years before \u2013\u202fand I\u2019ve already been on my own 10-year journey with blood cancer \u2013 I knew I had to dig deep and go.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I did. The appointment was over in minutes; utterly procedural, come in, take your shirt off, stand there. In the aftermath came a second letter.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"861\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314565-9d3b.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238152\" alt=\"Kit takes a selfie in bed, wearing a hospital gown\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>This was a chance to get the flat chest I\u2019d always dreamt of (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>They\u2019d found something. Apparently, I had a 25% chance of it being the Big C, so I needed a follow-up appointment, and went back in.\u202f&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Two weeks and 12 biopsies later, I sat in the breast clinic. I stared silently at the posters on the walls, various depictions of women, not one of them looked like, or I felt, represented me.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I thought being surrounded by others, all equally as anxious about what lay ahead would be unifying, but I felt so utterly out of place and very alone.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Sure enough, I was told I had cancer. It felt \u2013 and still feels \u2013 so very jarring and unaligned to who I am <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/06\/07\/navigating-healthcare-top-tips-from-trans-people-for-trans-people-16692884\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/06\/07\/navigating-healthcare-top-tips-from-trans-people-for-trans-people-16692884\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">to ever be discussing \u2018breasts\u2019<\/a>.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>As the words sank in, I couldn\u2019t help but feel like I was to blame. My thought process was that my long-held hatred for my boobs brought this upon myself because I\u2019d always wanted them gone.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The doctor went on to say it was very treatable, telling me how lucky I was, and that he\u2019d book me in for a lumpectomy (surgery to remove cancer and conserve the breast), or a single mastectomy (complete removal) and reconstruction, followed by radiotherapy.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"485\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314713-22c2.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238153\" alt=\"Kit: After my diagnosis, I was happy to get a double mastectomy\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>I couldn\u2019t help but feel like I was to blame (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<div class=\"factbox\" data-ico=\"factbox_article\" data-track-module=\"factbox_article\">\n<h2 class=\"factbox-title\">\n\t\t\t\tBreast cancer symptoms\t\t\t<\/h2>\n<div class=\"factbox-content\">\n<p class=\"\"><strong>The first symptom of breast cancer that most women notice is a lump or an area of thickened tissue in their breast.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"\">You should see a GP if you notice any of the following:<\/p>\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>a new lump or area of thickened tissue in either breast that was not there before<\/li>\n<li>a change in the size or shape of one or both breasts<\/li>\n<li>a&nbsp;discharge of fluid from either of your nipples<\/li>\n<li>a lump or swelling in either of your armpits<\/li>\n<li>a change in the look or feel of your skin, such as puckering or dimpling, a rash or redness<\/li>\n<li>a rash (like eczema), crusting, scaly or itchy skin or redness on or around your nipple<\/li>\n<li>a change in the appearance of your nipple, such as becoming sunken into your breast<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p class=\"\"><em><a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.nhs.uk\/conditions\/breast-cancer\/symptoms\/\" target=\"_blank\">Via NHS.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<p>The relief was huge. I wasn\u2019t going to die.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But, where did that leave my gender-affirming journey?\u202fI asked if a double mastectomy was an option, given that they were happy to take my cancer breast away and build me a new one, but he said, \u2018there was no need to remove a healthy breast\u2019.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I tried to explain how I identified and where I was on my gender journey, that cancer had thrown a massive spanner in my gender affirming care plans as top surgery may gets more complicated post radiotherapy cancer treatment, but the answer remained \u2018no\u2019.\u202f&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>For me, the only<strong> <\/strong>course of action was to have both my breasts removed. This was a chance to get the flat chest I\u2019d always dreamt of.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"485\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314712-fa35.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238155\" alt=\"Kit and Kit&#039;s wife, Emma\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>After six hours of surgery, I was wheeled back into my room, where my beautiful wife Emma was waiting (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>After several more disappointing appointments with surgeons, I finally found a private breast and oncoplastic specialist who was empathetic, listened to my story and understood that all cancer patients are unique.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Treatment is <em>not<\/em> a one size fits all and after taking my case to a multi-disciplinary board to gain approval, my amazing surgeon confirmed he\u2019d do a double mastectomy.\u202f\u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Six weeks later, he removed the cancer, both my breasts, my nipples, and reconstructed the skin around the pectoral muscles. After six hours of surgery, I was wheeled back into my room, where my beautiful wife Emma was waiting.\u202f\u202f\u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I remember her gently pulling the sheet down and opening the gown so I could see my completely flat chest.\u202fThe relief and joy were overwhelming.<\/p>\n<div class=\"factbox\" data-ico=\"factbox_article\" data-track-module=\"factbox_article\">\n<h2 class=\"factbox-title\">\n\t\t\t\tThe importance of screenings\t\t\t<\/h2>\n<div class=\"factbox-content\">\n<p><em>Cancer screening can help spot cancers at an early stage, when treatment is more likely to be successful. For advice on attending screening as a trans or non-binary binary person, visit Cancer Research UK\u2019s website&nbsp;<a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/eur02.safelinks.protection.outlook.com\/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cancerresearchuk.org%2Fabout-cancer%2Fcancer-symptoms%2Fspot-cancer-early%2Fscreening%2Ftrans-and-non-binary-cancer-screening&amp;data=05%7C02%7CJess.Austin%40metro.co.uk%7C1f77b4ae01a441defeeb08ddfa89ed7b%7C0f3a4c644dc54a768d4152d85ca158a5%7C0%7C0%7C638942192488950208%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJFbXB0eU1hcGkiOnRydWUsIlYiOiIwLjAuMDAwMCIsIlAiOiJXaW4zMiIsIkFOIjoiTWFpbCIsIldUIjoyfQ%3D%3D%7C0%7C%7C%7C&amp;sdata=Kv1YRRbMPffHK7hmlMvVCBXBwWIt%2FAa0fhcRkFeapmg%3D&amp;reserved=0\">here<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Screening is for people without symptoms. If you notice anything that is not normal for you, contact your GP. In most cases it won\u2019t be cancer, but if it is, spotting it early can make a real difference<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"639\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314566-f1ff-e1758616936503.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238150\" alt=\"Kit smiling while showing their flat chest, post surgery\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>I urge everyone, no matter how you feel about your body (parts) \u2013 please don\u2019t ignore them (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Amid the tears and fear of cancer, it was the amazing silver lining.\u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Post-surgery, I attended a cancer support group, hoping to meet someone who may relate to my experience. But as I shared my story, I felt like such a fraud, guilty for feeling so positive about what cancer had given me. \u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Certain cancers \u2013 like the blood cancer I live with and keep under control with daily chemo tablets \u2013 feel non-gendered. I have regular check-ups and every time the waiting room is filled with a variety of people, so I never feel out of place \u2013 we all bleed red.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But what about those cancers that are typically associated with one gender? We need more consideration as to how they might affect someone who doesn\u2019t identify with their sex assigned at birth.\u202f\u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>This <em>has<\/em> to improve. But I urge everyone, no matter how you feel about your body (parts) \u2013 please don\u2019t ignore them.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"699\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/10\/SEI_267314718-af0c-e1758616867613.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-24238142\" alt=\"Kit takes a selfie in front of the sea\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>Post-surgery, I attended a cancer support group, hoping to meet someone who may relate to my experience (Picture: Kit)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Female cancers can affect you, <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/08\/23\/why-its-vital-for-everyone-with-breasts-to-practice-breast-awareness-17223369\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/08\/23\/why-its-vital-for-everyone-with-breasts-to-practice-breast-awareness-17223369\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">even if you don\u2019t identify as female<\/a>.\u202f&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>From the horridness of cancer, I\u2019ve been fortunate to be able to take something positive \u2013 to finally choose the body shape that is right for me. But what if there are more people like me within our beautiful <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/transgender\/\">trans<\/a> and non-binary community?&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Can\u2019t we be doing more to be kinder and more inclusive? To ensure\u202feveryone is seen for who they are and how they identify?&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Whatever <a data-track=\"inline-tag-auto-link_article\" href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/health-news\/\">health<\/a> services people need to access, they should be able to do so with the care, respect, and dignity they deserve.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Do you have a story you\u2019d like to share? Get in touch by emailing <a href=\"mailto:James.Besanvalle@metro.co.uk\">James.Besanvalle@metro.co.uk<\/a>.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Share your views in the comments below.<\/strong><\/p>\n<section id=\"share-buttons-bottom\" class=\"share-buttons share-buttons-bottom\"><\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My cancer diagnosis was traumatic, but also an opportunity to get the chest I\u2019d always wanted (Picture: Kit) For most women, losing their breasts through cancer can be a hugely traumatic experience, both physically and emotionally.&nbsp; But I\u2019m not\u202fmost\u202fwomen. I identify as trans non-binary, sitting comfortably between genders.&nbsp; This was brought into sharp focus in [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6203,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6201"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6201"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6201\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6211,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6201\/revisions\/6211"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6203"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6201"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6201"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6201"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}