{"id":3822,"date":"2025-05-30T05:30:00","date_gmt":"2025-05-30T05:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/?p=3822"},"modified":"2025-06-04T21:33:43","modified_gmt":"2025-06-04T21:33:43","slug":"i-kissed-a-stranger-in-a-club-then-came-my-shocking-diagnosis","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/2025\/05\/30\/i-kissed-a-stranger-in-a-club-then-came-my-shocking-diagnosis\/","title":{"rendered":"I kissed a stranger in a club \u2013 then came my shocking diagnosis"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I immediately felt like I wasn\u2019t being taken seriously (Picture: Getty Images)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Sitting in the sexual health<\/a> clinic early one Saturday morning, the doctor\u2019s face was confused.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d just disclosed that I thought I had contracted gonorrhoea<\/a> from kissing a stranger in a club. <\/p>\n

She said: \u2018I haven\u2019t heard of that before.\u2019<\/p>\n

I immediately felt like I wasn\u2019t being taken seriously. As though she assumed I was naive and clinging to a convenient excuse.<\/p>\n

But I can categorically say that I didn\u2019t do anything more than kiss \u2013 and that\u2019s how I believe I contracted my infection.<\/p>\n

A few weeks earlier, I was in a nightclub and made out with a guy on the dancefloor.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been with my partner, Alex*, for several years. We\u2019re mostly monogamous<\/a>, with the exception that I sometimes kiss people in club settings.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s an arrangement that works for us.<\/p>\n

That night in the club, I kissed this stranger<\/a> a few times passionately over the course of the evening.<\/p>\n

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That night in the club, I kissed this stranger (Picture: Getty Images\/iStockphoto)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

And that was it. No sex. No other contact.<\/p>\n

A week later, my throat was covered in white bacterial spots. Tonsillitis, said the doctor<\/a>. I was prescribed a course of antibiotics and I was better in a few days.<\/p>\n

But within a few weeks, Alex started experiencing a burning sensation when he urinated. We assumed it was a urinary tract infection<\/a> so he sought help and was prescribed some medication.<\/p>\n

But something didn\u2019t quite add up. As the weeks went on and Alex\u2019s symptoms worsened, I racked my brain for other explanations.<\/p>\n

I can\u2019t remember exactly what made me question it, but I googled \u2018can you get an STI <\/a>from kissing?\u2019 That\u2019s when things changed. <\/p>\n

One of the first hits, published only a few weeks earlier, was a piece in the Standard that cited an Australian study that suggested \u2018kissing, but not sex, is the strongest risk factor\u2019 for oral gonorrhoea. <\/p>\n

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He\u2019s now waiting for an operation that could have life-changing consequences like incontinence if it doesn\u2019t go well<\/p>\n

Quote<\/title><title>Quote<\/title><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I discussed it with Alex and we both agreed that this felt plausible given our symptoms and experiences in the weeks previous.<\/p>\n<p>So we went to a sexual health clinic one morning for a walk-in appointment. <\/p>\n<p>Within a few hours, we both had our answer: <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2023\/03\/17\/government-urges-people-to-get-sti-tests-as-gonorrhoea-cases-spike-18459488\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2023\/03\/17\/government-urges-people-to-get-sti-tests-as-gonorrhoea-cases-spike-18459488\/\">gonorrhoea<\/a>. It wasn\u2019t really a surprise, more confirmation. After all, we\u2019d read the study and our symptoms and experience matched up.<\/p>\n<p>But this is when I had the interaction with the clinician who felt <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2025\/03\/28\/were-young-women-herpes-wont-shamed-22811534\/\">dismissive of how I contracted the STI.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Alex\u2019s clinician was even more resolute \u2013 categorically saying it wasn\u2019t possible to get gonorrhoea from kissing. It left me frustrated.<\/p>\n<p>Thankfully, I was lucky. I had a mild case and was treated quickly with an antibiotic injection. But Alex wasn\u2019t. <\/p>\n<p>The antibiotics cleared the infection and he tested negative a few weeks later. But symptoms persisted.<\/p>\n<figure class=\"img-container shareable-item wp-caption\">\n<div class=\"img-wrap\">\n\t\t<img width=\"646\" height=\"431\" src=\"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/GettyImages-1022793180.jpg\" class=\"article-image wp-image-23277456\" alt=\"Doctor writing on clipboard\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t<\/div><figcaption>According to UK health guidance, what happened to us isn\u2019t even possible (Picture: Getty Images)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Over time, he developed complications \u2013<a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2018\/01\/04\/what-its-like-to-live-with-a-fistula-the-ibd-problem-that-no-one-talks-about-7130941\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2018\/01\/04\/what-its-like-to-live-with-a-fistula-the-ibd-problem-that-no-one-talks-about-7130941\/\"> a fistula near<\/a> his anus. It took several visits to both the sexual health clinic and his GP before anyone took the problem seriously or made a connection to the infection.<\/p>\n<p>Eventually, he had to push hard to be referred to hospital. He\u2019s now waiting for an operation that could have life-changing consequences like incontinence if it doesn\u2019t go well. <\/p>\n<p>But according to UK health guidance, what happened to us isn\u2019t even possible. In fact, multiple regional <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/tag\/nhs\/\">NHS<\/a> websites categorically state it\u2019s not possible.<\/p>\n<p>And when we tried to speak up about it, I don\u2019t think we were taken seriously. <\/p>\n<p>Gonorrhoea is surging in the UK, with case load records being broken year after year. There are even strands of what\u2019s being called super gonorrhoea, which is resistant to antibiotic treatments.<\/p>\n<p>Men who have sex with men are among the groups worst affected. I believe it\u2019s another example in a long <a href=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/06\/07\/how-has-lgbtq-healthcare-developed-over-the-last-50-years-16776446\/\" data-type=\"link\" data-id=\"https:\/\/metro.co.uk\/2022\/06\/07\/how-has-lgbtq-healthcare-developed-over-the-last-50-years-16776446\/\">history of queer people<\/a> and other marginalised communities being failed by public health bodies.  <\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p>There are even strands of what\u2019s being called super gonorrhoea, which is resistant to antibiotic treatments<\/p>\n<p><title>Quote<\/title><title>Quote<\/title><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>The recent announcement of a gonorrhoea vaccine being rolled out from August is great news. But the NHS doesn\u2019t need to wait until August to broaden their advice. <\/p>\n<p>Maybe the evidence around kissing isn\u2019t yet conclusive enough. But surely that\u2019s a reason to say more, not less.<\/p>\n<p>Health authorities and researchers in the United States and Australia both acknowledge that gonorrhea can be transmitted this way. But the NHS has been slow \u2013 stubborn even \u2013 in updating its guidance.<\/p>\n<p>A line in NHS guidance that says something like this would be a start: \u2018Some research suggests transmission may also be possible through kissing, though more studies are needed\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>Instead, Alex and I were left in the dark. And one of us is now facing a serious operation as a result.<\/p>\n<p>For us, this wasn\u2019t about being reckless or irresponsible. It was about being denied the information we needed to manage our own risk, and being dismissed when we tried to speak up.<\/p>\n<p>The vaccine is welcome. But it won\u2019t fix a public health culture that still fails to listen to \u2013 or inform \u2013 the people most at risk.<\/p>\n<p><em>*Name has been changed<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Do you have a story you\u2019d like to share? Get in touch by emailing <a href=\"mailto:jess.austin@metro.co.uk\">jess.austin@metro.co.uk<\/a>.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Share your views in the comments below.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I immediately felt like I wasn\u2019t being taken seriously (Picture: Getty Images) Sitting in the sexual health clinic early one Saturday morning, the doctor\u2019s face was confused. I\u2019d just disclosed that I thought I had contracted gonorrhoea from kissing a stranger in a club.  She said: \u2018I haven\u2019t heard of that before.\u2019 I immediately felt […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3824,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3822"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3822"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3822\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3828,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3822\/revisions\/3828"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3824"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3822"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3822"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3822"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}