{"id":2824,"date":"2025-05-10T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-05-10T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/?p=2824"},"modified":"2025-05-14T21:39:35","modified_gmt":"2025-05-14T21:39:35","slug":"doctors-ignored-my-symptoms-but-took-my-boyfriend-seriously-when-he-intervened","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/2025\/05\/10\/doctors-ignored-my-symptoms-but-took-my-boyfriend-seriously-when-he-intervened\/","title":{"rendered":"Doctors ignored my symptoms \u2013 but took my boyfriend seriously when he intervened"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
I felt relief \u2013 as well as confusion (Picture: Steve Ullathorne)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

\u2018Have you tried being less stressed?\u2019 the doctor suggested. I did my best to hide my frustration.<\/p>\n

For the better part of four weeks, I\u2019d been dealing with a full-body rash<\/a>, which had suddenly become red and increasingly sore. Then one morning in May 2024, taking a shower felt like acid rain<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Upon my GP\u2019s advice, my boyfriend, Adam, and I went to A&E, and this was the response I received. I felt like I wasn\u2019t being heard, my experience invalidated.<\/p>\n

Then Adam spoke up. \u2018She’s in a lot of pain and needs help,\u2019 he said calmly and clearly. \u2018The advice so far hasn’t improved things and it’s getting worse.\u2019 <\/p>\n

The doctor listened and prescribed a strong painkiller<\/a>. I felt relief \u2013 as well as confusion. <\/p>\n

My medical history is complex (at best) and I have grown up feeling dismissed.<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
Over the last 30 years I\u2019ve experienced a number of mental health conditions (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I developed symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder<\/a> (OCD), anxiety and depression around the age of nine, all of which were disregarded as a \u2018phase\u2019. <\/p>\n

Over the last 30 years I\u2019ve experienced a number of mental health conditions \u2013 bulimia, anorexia, binge eating disorder and depression \u2013 as well as ongoing physical concerns, and I have frequently been told that my mental health is the cause of my physical symptoms<\/a>. <\/p>\n

It wasn’t until anorexia took hold when I was 14 that medical professionals took things seriously. <\/p>\n

I had multiple life-saving hospitalisations but <\/strong>was subsequently given many new diagnoses, including <\/strong>bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder and body dysmorphic disorder<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
I felt as though I was viewed as\u00a0an attention seeker \u2013 in reality, I was crying out for help (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Unfortunately, these interventions came too late. I developed further complications, including psychosis and hallucinations, paranoia and agoraphobia, with complex PTSD (cPTSD) suggested eventually in my 30s as being at the root of it all.<\/p>\n

I felt as though I was viewed as an attention seeker \u2013 in reality, I was crying out for help.<\/p>\n

As I entered my thirties, physical issues including musculoskeletal pain and digestive problems came to the fore. Again, doctors dismissed these as psychological in origin, as though my pain was an extension of my depression.<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
I internalised that misogyny not to \u2018be a burden\u2019 and to stop \u2018making a fuss over nothing\u2019 (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

As a result, I stopped trusting my own body and started believing their dismissals. I went along with whatever was said because I didn\u2019t have the energy to keep fighting. And I internalised that misogyny not to \u2018be a burden\u2019 and to stop \u2018making a fuss over nothing\u2019.<\/p>\n

I also <\/strong>stopped visiting my GP, which, unsurprisingly, impacted my health further, and any treatment I did receive seemed to be massively <\/strong>delayed. <\/strong>At times, I felt utterly lost, alone. <\/p>\n

It wasn\u2019t until that A&E experience in 2024 that I finally wondered: Why had it taken Adam\u2019s advocacy for doctors to respond? Why had they responded far faster to his voice than mine?<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
Meanwhile, women are still suffering (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Finally, I realised: It was the clearest case I\u2019d ever experienced of medical misogyny.<\/a> <\/p>\n

Sadly, I\u2019m not the only woman to experience it. According to one study, the UK has the highest gender health gap out of all the G20 countries and medical misogyny contributes <\/strong>to misdiagnoses, inadequate pain management and delayed treatment. <\/p>\n

The same research found that 60% of women in the UK believe their health issues are not taken seriously<\/a>, and 57% of women have had a negative experience with a healthcare professional. <\/p>\n

Those figures are devastating yet there is little being done to eradicate them. Meanwhile, women are still suffering.<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
The rash covered every inch of my body from neck to toe (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Had Adam not driven me to A&E, convinced me to endure the six-hour-long wait to be seen then spoken to the doctor himself, I suspect I would have been cast aside again<\/em>. <\/p>\n

Later that week, when we collected steroid cream<\/a> prescribed for my rash, it was only thanks to Adam <\/strong>pushing back against the pharmacy staff <\/strong>that I received the correct amount instead of a bottle no bigger than the size of a travel toothpaste.<\/p>\n

I’ve no idea why I was initially issued such a small tube, I think it might have been the correct dosage that had been prescribed but too small a dosage to cover my entire body. <\/p>\n

The rash covered every inch of my body from neck to toe, but we were given a tube that would’ve dealt with a rash on the back of your hand.<\/p>\n

\n
\n\t\t\"Juliette\t<\/div>
No woman should have to feel like they\u00a0need\u00a0to bring a man to an appointment just to get the doctor\u2019s attention (Picture: Juliette Burton)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\n
Comment now<\/title><span class=\"metro-comment-cta__text\">Have you experienced medical misogyny? Have your say in the comments below<\/span><\/span><a class=\"metro-comment-cta__button\" href=\"#metro-comments-container\">Comment Now<\/a><\/div>\n<\/section>\n<p>It\u2019s infuriating and unjust that a man\u2019s voice seems to still command more authority than a woman\u2019s in this day and age. Whether I\u2019m getting my car fixed or calling for a plumber, people often defer to my male partner. <\/p>\n<p>This kind of dismissal in healthcare is especially dangerous. It jeopardises women\u2019s wellbeing. I wonder how many of my medical problems could’ve been prevented had I not had my complaints ignored.<\/p>\n<p>No woman should have to feel like they need to bring a man to an appointment just to get the doctor\u2019s attention.<\/p>\n<p>Medical training must stamp out medical misogyny at the source and culturally, we<strong> <\/strong>need to encourage people to stand up for themselves when they aren\u2019t getting the care they need. <\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m trying to get better at that. I\u2019ve spent enough of my life waiting to be heard, but no more.<strong> <\/strong>I’m starting by calling myself and my internalised misogyny out.<\/p>\n<p>Every single person, of any gender, should be listened to when it comes to their health. We will not stand for being dismissed anymore.  <\/p>\n<p><em>(As told to Hannah Shewan Stevens)<\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Do you have a story you\u2019d like to share? Get in touch by emailing <a href=\"mailto:jess.austin@metro.co.uk\">jess.austin@metro.co.uk<\/a>.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\"><strong>Share your views in the comments below.<\/strong><\/p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I felt relief \u2013 as well as confusion (Picture: Steve Ullathorne) \u2018Have you tried being less stressed?\u2019 the doctor suggested. I did my best to hide my frustration. For the better part of four weeks, I\u2019d been dealing with a full-body rash, which had suddenly become red and increasingly sore. Then one morning in May 2024, taking a shower […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2826,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2824"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2824"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2824\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2834,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2824\/revisions\/2834"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2826"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2824"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2824"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/curiousdrive.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2824"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}